Foreplay Starts With You
Responsive desire, responsibility, and turning yourself on first
Waiting for your partner to get you in the mood is a losing strategy.
Most women — and many men — experience responsive desire. That means arousal doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. It builds in response to stimulation.
I say it all the time: kissing isn’t always enough for me. I need touch all over my body. I need sensation. I need activation.
But it’s not my husband’s responsibility to always generate that for me.
It’s Valentine’s Day today. My husband offered to give me a foot massage tonight — which will more than likely lead to sex.
And that sex would probably be good. Comfortable. Predictable.
But is that what I want tonight?
Or do I want electric sex? Hungry sex? The kind that surprises us both?
Today, in between basketball games, sitting in the car, I decided to listen to a podcast. The host had reached out to invite me on as a guest, so I thought I should get a feel for their vibe. It’s called The Lifestyle Lounge, a Melbourne-based podcast dedicated to the swingers lifestyle.
